[book review] Talk Less, Say More – Connie Dieken

I’m currently doing the one book/mth-thing.

I read “Talk Less, Say More” by Connie Dieken, a communications guru.

Here’s the summary of her key points, to help me retain the lessons learnt:

The game of communicating comes down to three simple blocks: “connecting, conveying, and convincing”

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CONNECTING:

1) Stay in the moment:
– pay attention to the people who are with you in the moment

2) Frontload:
– be more direct; reduce the clutter and drive your point home; choose their preferred method of communication; defuse defensiveness

3) Goldilocks candor:
– don’t demoralize; don’t sugarcoat; create a candid culture

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CONVEYING:

1) The eyes trump the ears
– Show contrast

2) Talk in triplets:
– Preload three choices; desired choice first (second most desired choice last)

3) Tell stories:
– Stories that feature a positive future; think simple and spry; delivery with planned spontaneity

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CONVINCING:

1)Sound decisive
– stop tagging and hedging; voice your opinions with sincereity

2)Transfer of ownership
– use peer power (testimonial); review your reasoning (intent); let it flow(reach out encouragement; respond; reinforce urgency; use thoughtful gestures)

3) Adjust your energy
– add warmth to your voice; add energy to your face; powerful body language

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CONCLUSION:

Connect to what others want and value to grab their attention
Convey with portion control to create clarity, not confusion
Convince them to personally commit and take a specific action